My face fell. "Where are they?" I asked. The nurse calmly replied that they were in the nursery getting checked out. Huh? Why would they be in the nursery when they can do all the routine stuff here by my bedside in the PACU? "Why? What is going on?" I asked in bold font style. "It's ok, they are just in the nursery. We'll send someone over to find out what is going on." "What do you mean, 'what's going on?' What is wrong with him? Why isn't he here?!? GO GET HIM."
Thus, my transition from loopy patient to crazy lady was complete. The nurse at the nurses station chimed in, "We don't keep things from you. He is probably in the nursery because there are too many babies being born and not enough nurses to have one at every recovery station."
"Where is he?!? What's wrong?!? Someone go find out what is happening RIGHT NOW. Where is he?!?"
"We do not keep things from you. If there was something wrong we would tell you. He is just getting checked out in the nursery. He will be here soon. We just don't have enough staff today."
"GO GET HIM. I need to see him. RIGHT.NOW."
"You need to calm down."
"I actually feel really calm right now."
Nurses snicker all around me.
"Well, I mean my body feels really calm. I can't read and I'm floating. But my mind is going crazy."
At that moment, Andres came around the corner (I think the nurse at the nurses station had gone to get him because...someone please come and calm this cray). The other nurses quickly excused themselves from the situation and the poor PACU nurse was left all alone to deal with floating, illiterate, cray cray Heather Frowow. I asked Andres how many babies were in the nursery and he said two. What?!? Just two!?! I can't be certain, but I may have shot some dirty looks toward the nurses station.
The poor PACU nurse tried to ask me questions about my pain and if I could wiggle my toes, feel this prick and that prick in between me shouting at Andres to "go back to the nursery and stay with him. He's scared." Apparently my dear husband never received the memo to not argue with an illiterate post-partum woman all jacked up on toradal and who knows what. He refused. Again, I calmly requested Andres to "go back to the nursery and stay with him. He is scared and needs you." Andres looked around and I think he saw the pleading looks in the nurses eyes because he complied.
Seconds later he returned with Kai and suddenly all was right with the world. Plus also, I could read again. My literacy came back out of nowhere. The nurses badge said "Anne." It was reported that his Apgar scores were 8 and 9. We tried nursing, but Kai was too tired. I asked to do skin-to-skin with Kai. This was something I had missed with Max because I was too busy worrying about stuff like "what do Apgar scores even mean?" I wasn't going to make that mistake again.
Anne helped me unsnap my gown and push up Kai's onesie. She laid him on my chest and the most wonderful feeling I have ever felt in my life rushed over me.
So.Freaking.Happy.We only stayed in the PACU for about 30 minutes instead of the usual hour...yeah, they rushed me out of there real quick. Probably because they were incredibly busy and needed the bed. Don't you think!?! wink.